Tuesday

Never could get the hang of Tuesdays....
Monday. Everyone hates 'em, there's even a song about not liking Mondays. Now for me, Mondays are okay, you're (presumably) rested from the weekend, with a faint patina of hope on your soul. Tuesday rolls in, and that small reserve of energy you've built up over the weekend has been expended, and you still have to do whatever it is you do for four more days! Bleh.

Breaking More than One Bad Habit
Alright, here's what happened. Went to a little convenience store by work in the afternoon to get myself some snackage. Now today was supposed to be the last day I allowed myself to have smokes: only 5 today. So I go into the store, get a bag of Hickory Sticks and a lotto ticket, and I walk out with a pack of smokes without even realizing it! It had become part of the daily routine: snack-food, stupidity tax and nicotine. The nice old guy working the register doesn't even ask anymore, I don't question it. I'd chuck 'em but they are $11 a pack.
So the revision is, no smoking at work. Good thing Stray Lemming moved to another floor or he'd kill me. Or me him.

So I Didn't Go See George RR Martin

He has a book-signing today in town. Was going to go, but decided to duck out. Okay, lame out. But I have my flimsy justifications.
When I was getting me English-as-a-first-language degree, I met a lot of authors. Many. And almost all of them struck me as stuck-up elitist jerks. So I have a natural derision of auteurs. Now I'm not saying Mr. Martin is a stuck up effete intelligentsia type. But authors, as a breed, make me snarl. And I'm trying to become one, which is probably another 6 months on a couch in a well appointed office....
Second reason is I'm not a big autograph fan. I know I could get some coinage on eBay, but I don't whore myself out that way. Much. And besides, I think if a writer has anything interesting to say, they will say it in their work.

On-Line Dating

Looks like I provoked an emotional response on Lavalife. Sent a smile, got one back. Somewhere in between she had updated her profile in a way which made me pause a bit (I'm picturing cheap silver jewelry, chakra crystals and palm readings). But I wrote her anyway. Meeting people online is just like meeting people in real life, except with more spelling mistakes and bad grammar. So we'll see what happens.
PS the 'adult entertainer' is back on LL, this time with two profiles. Wonder if she remembers me? And if she would be pissed that I was the one who squealed on her.

Coda

Did laundry, dishes and cleaned up the non-linoleum half of my apartment today. Also looking at the mirror, there's some muscle tone forming 9course it may just be tumor). Screw the self-help books, if you want to improve your looks and living conditions, just be single! Which of course obviates the reasons you want to improve yourself. Hells, if I wasn't concerned about, er, things, you know... I'd gain 80 pounds in cheeseburgers alone. And leave the wrappers everywhere!

How To Install a Mother-#&%*ing Board

So I did manage to install my dual core, 2.2 Ghz motherboard with 2Gb of RAM.

• 10:35 am Finish pot of coffee
• 10:36 am Locate Windows XP Professional SP2 CD
• 10:37 am Find huge scratch on CD
• 10:58 am Finish burning new CD from ISO
• 10:59 am Disconnect Computer from nest of cables at back of box
• 11:00 am Reconnect computer to download latest BIOS updates from motherboard manufacturer
• 11:06 am Disconnect Computer from nest of cables at back of box
• 11:08 am Attempt to find clean surface to do work
• 11:11 am Clean off kitchen table
• 11:12 am Crack Case
• 11:13 am Remove power leads and IDE cables from motherboard and attempt to remove same
• 11:23 am Locate final screw holding old motherboard in case
• 11:23 am Remove Hard Drives from case
• 11:23:02 am Try not to have a cigarette
• 11:33 am Place new motherboard into case
• 11:45 am Find find last screw under stove
• 11:46 am Really try not to think about having a smoke
• 11:47 am Reconnect drive IDE cables and power cables
• 11:49 am discover odd red liquid on new motherboard
• 11:50 am attempt to find Band-Aid
• 11:58 am go to car to get first aid kid
• 12:02 pm use kleenex and duct tape as handy replacement to bandaid
• 12:05 pm plug in mouse and keyboard, power and network cable into case and switch on
• 12:05:30 pm try again
• 12:06:20 pm try again
• 12:09 pm try and find manual for new motherboard
• 12:11 pm read manual, discover motherboard need another power lead: 12v ATX four prong square lead
• 12:12 pm attempt to find above lead on power supply
• 12:18 pm Remove power supply
• 12:20 pm Re-install power supply
• 12:25 pm shower to go out to get 12v ATX four prong square adapter at computer store
• 12:50 pm decide to check power supply one more time for lead
• 12:52 pm plug in 12v ATX four prong square lead
• 12:53 pm turn computer on
• 12:54 pm reverse installation of mouse and keyboard, restart computer
• 12:55 pm smile as BIOS boots
• 12:55 pm swear as BIOS report over-clock error
• 12:56 pm reset BIOS to factory settings and restart computer
• 12:57 pm Windows loads!
• 12:58 pm install drivers as prompted
• 1:25 pm restart computer
• 1:26 pm attempt re-install of graphics card driver
• 1:31 pm remove graphics card and reboot
• 1:34 pm reinstall graphics card and reboot
• 1:36 pm have a cigarette
• 1:49 pm arrive at office and look up problem on Microsoft Support site
• 2:12 pm look up problem on Google
• 2:13 pm find resolution on Google boards
• 2:33 pm get home and install non-Microsoft driver for video card
• 2:35 pm set desktop to max resolution
• 2:36 pm remove sound card and restart
• 2:37 pm re-install sound card and reboot
• 2:44 pm tell landlady that I will keep the swearing volume to a minimum
• 2:45 pm invent new alcoholic beverage: Vodka, Red Grapefruit juice and Ginger Ale, christen new drink a "Morgan Webb"
• 2:55 pm reinstall original sound card driver
• 2:56 pm install sound card patches
• 3:10 pm restart computer
• 3:11 pm Windows prompts that OS needs to be re-registered due to hardware changes
• 3:12 pm try and find registration key
• 3:18 pm realize that key is on USB storage device
• 3:18:10 pm realize that USB storage device is plugged into computer at work
• 3:19 pm have another "Morgan Webb" and cigarette
• 3:22 pm find business card that has registration key written on it
• 3:23 pm re-register Windows
• 3:24 pm Blog it!

So yay! I have my new-kick ass machine up and running. Only problem now is that it doesn't recognize my CD burner or DVD drive. Another time, after I have another "Morgan Webb"

Nixon's Baaaaaack!

Last night someone told me that I look like a younger Richard Nixon. I totally blame this on my Dad who insisted on calling me 'Tricky Dick' growing up.
That is all. Have to burn some tapes now.

Quadruple The Readership!

First off, props to Stray Lemming (see sidebar for link) for expanding readership to 4! I got a few laughs, which is the ultimate goal of this whole endeavor (for today at least).

Heart of Gold
So I did get the new computer 'heart': dual core CPU, 2 gigs of memory and liquid cooled motherboard. Ready to rock the 3D animation world! Just gotta drop a grand to get the software... Will be installing this weekend, and considering my ineptness, you probably will never hear from me again as I fry both the old and new systems.

Example: My computer has been shutting down when doing CPU intensive tasks (ie gaming). So after blowing out the small civilization of dust-bunnies in my box (they had advanced beyond the Bronze age to the scavenging Gold from Circuits age) it was still happening. So after I ordered the new hardware, I noticed that the CPU fan wasn't rotating very much. $10 bucks later (after buying a new CPU fan) the problems stopped. So I dropped a grand for nothing. But I'm still excited about the new gear: I'll take the old motherboard and get a new case and hard drive for more work-related programming.

Rocket Surgery Delayed due to Rising Health Care Costs
Still working on it, but translating code to thought process is more intensive than I thought. Putting a graphic object model together, so first entry will be when I get a first draft done of that.

A Novel Idea
So last night I had a great idea for a novel. Because this is the internet and my follow-through is horrible if not downright criminal, I won't be describing it here. However I will write at least one chapter by the end of the month to hand around to friends.

This is me: great ideas, too lazy to implement. Worked for 37 years so why change now?

The Shack-Up Question: A revisionist history
So I've been giving some thought on a previous post on me and relationships. You may recall I expressed some distaste at the idea of moving in with a significant other (when I had a significant other). Further contemplation has concluded two things:

• I really don't mind the idea of living with someone, I've done it before and wasn't too bad (the living together part anyway). As long as I can do what I want to do (with some understandable curtailment of volume of course) I don't see a problem.
• At the time of the post, I subliminally knew that this would not happen with my S/O at the time. Her continuous derogatory remarks on what I did in my own time may have had something to do with that. Plus I didn't get much "me" time when living in separate domiciles, living under the same roof wouldn't have helped matters at all.

Coda

That's about it for now, I'm actually looking forward to updating this site (positive re-enforcement does wonders) on a semi-regular basis. Oh and for those so inclined, here's one of my profiles from a dating site. Enjoy!

First off, call me Moby, everyone does. Glad ta meetcha!So let's see, start with physical:6'2" eyes of bl...er, brown.Hair is brown, with a little salt on the sides, and a slightly receding hairline.

Did I mention I'm 37? I'm 37 (thus the salt and hairline, hey it happens!)

Body type is thin but working out quite a bit (when you're single you seem to have the time, but you knew that already).

I'm a computer programmer (so gainfully employed, I understand that's a "positive"). Living and working and playing (but not quite as much as I want to) in Calgary. Close to downtown, no suburban wasteland for me!

Hmm, let's see, no kids, trying to quit smoking (this is hard, but I keep on keepin' on).

Personality wise, I try to balance the smart and smart-azz sides of myself, with varying success. I'm a huge reader (just drop waaaay too much at bookstores), like skiing, biking and recently got bit by the travel bug! (Trip to Mexico and 2 to Italy in the past two years!). Oh yeah and movies, lots of movies! From cheese to foreign films, only ones I'm not thrilled with are slasher films (but zombie films rock!) Akira Kurasawa all the way!

Oh yeah, I'm a geek. Have the T-shirt and everything. Get really weird looks when I wear it to the gym!

So I'm looking for..... er, well, I'm trying not to build up too many expectations. Someone who feels the same would be great: no schedule to keep, just take life (and people) as they comes. Almost everyone says sense of humour, but if you can quote Monty Python, I'm already smitten (I did say I'm a geek, right?) So anyway, there I am, an open book (with full colour illustrations and small, easy to read words, just the way I like 'em).

Until We meet again, don't know where, don't know when...

MMO No Mo'

Okay just cancelled my accounts with City of Heroes, City of Villains, World of Warcraft and There (though to be honest I forgot I even signed up for There).

So now your asking yourself 'Why Should I Care'? You shouldn't but it's my damn blog.

MMOs really thrilled me at first, the interaction, the huge worlds to explore the open ended gameplay.

But lately it's just been a grind. CoH/CoV just doesn't have the variety to keep my interest anymore. WoW, well after waiting 30 minutes in queue just to deal with net-kiddies is just frustrating. And There, it's a 3d chat-room. Never been much for chat-rooms, although the do have some amazing avatar technology. With voice, when you say something, it is able to good a good job at making your avatar speak with the same facial expressions.

So gaming now will be single player (unless I get a FPS with internet play). Right now, that's Fate, Space Hack, Fable (but almost done). So I'm gonna go pick up some more games (no idea what though).

On the tech side, my CPU keeps overheating, even after putting in 2 additional fans and scrubbing out the heat sinks. Time to upgrade anyway. Dual core baby!

Ummm, yep, still single...

Happy New Years and all that

Man I feel sooooo hungover.

And the weird thing is that I didn't have anything to drink. Which means I'm actually just sick.

Fuck.

The Camera Broke

Yeppers, that's me. Ah well, so much for anonymity.

So I finally got the Season 2.0 (which makes me wonder about 2.1) of Battlestar Galactica.
Ohboyohboyohboy!

Granted it wasn't until 8pm, so I've gone through the first disk. 2 disks and something like 6 hours to go!

Screw New Year's, I'm geeking out.

Oh and by the way, why didn't anyone tell me about Morgan Webb?!? I caught the show and bleh, but man. Hotness!

Yep that's me, single guy, 37 years old, likes computer games. Go figure.

Chrsitmas is Over! Shut Up!

Actually this will be a relatively bile-free post.
So that's it, the presents have been unwrapped, the nog has been nogged, the tinsle on the tree has lost it's sparkle (if not its edge) for another year.
So this year not much for phat lewt, as usual but I'm okay with that. I'd prefer the exchange of cards and small tokens over the soul-crushing need to find that perfect gift for that special someone and, in return, getting socks. So I got everybody socks or a reasonable facsimile. Maybe I am cheap. Too bad.
One really great thing was a chance encounter with some old friends of mine. After the usually 'how are you? you look great! / haven't changed a bit!' routine, numbers were exchanged. After the holidays, went over to their place for a few beers and to watch a PPV hockey game and catch up. So I am reforging those social links, even though the live 2 hours away :)
They're having a New Year's Eve party which I may go to.

So Merry Christmas, have a Happy New Year, let's all get together and drink lots of beer!

And do expect a rant/rave/rambling at about 2am Jan, 2006. 2006! The future is now!

For a Depressing Time, Date Online

Oi gevalt.

Okay as part of being a singleton/singularity/singulation kinda dude, I started up my profile on good ol' Lavalife. And so far, it's a very depressing experience (again)

Profile: Or Try to Be Sexy in 500 Words or Less

Okay you always start by trying to do a fun, witty, charming, sexy essay on yourself and what you are looking for in a 'mate'. Despite my writing aspirations, I simply cannot write a cohesive paragraph about myself. Just can't. You try and make yourself sound funny (which I am) fun (which I can be for a specific subset of fun), intelligent (without proving the Pythagorean Theorem) and sexy (yeah, right).

Honesty = Chastity

I don't want to have kids. I'm really, really reluctant to go out with a women who has kids. At age 37, this now eliminates the dating pool by 90%. Add to that, I am actually honest and say I smoke on my profile. Not 'Prefer not to Say', not 'Trying to Quit', not 'Socially'. So there goes another 9%. I am making quitting my New Year's resolution because of this. Health be damned, I need a little sumthin'-sumthin'. I am not going through another 5-year drought.

Women My Age Don't Want Men My Age

Harsh but there ya go. Most women between 32 and 40 are looking for a guy 10 years their junior (at least according to the profiles I clicked on). While one part of me can see why this is happening, when I look at women's profiles 10 years my junior, they state very explicitly they want nothing to do with 35+ men. The other part of me thinks that mid-life crisis happen to both sexes.

Saying Hello is a Turn Off?

For those not in the know, most of these dating sites work by people buying credits (or similar). With these, you can email, message etc those you are interested in. So I bought the mid-size package. In 22 emails, I had one response. She was kind enough to send me a link to her site, which listed her rates; hourly, for an evening or for an 'all-nighter'.
Other than that, nada. No responses from emails (except one, see below). Not even a courteous 'no thanks' or even a 'fuck off creep!'.

Smile!

Lavalife does have one free feature. You can send a 'smile' and one of a selection of notes (most of which I could not see myself saying to a live person). This is of course to show your interest, with hopes that they 'smile' back (with equally cheesy phrase) . Then you can spend your credits with confidence. One tactic is to shotgun them: send them out to anyone and everyone in hopes that a few hit the mark. I'm all for gun control. I try and be very specific and discerning with my smiles. No smiles back though.
Now I do understand that happens alot. What I don't understand is, alot of women say 'send a smile!' or 'write me!'. You do and nada. Again, I'm not indiscriminate or go just be the pictures: I read the profiles, compare compatibility and if its seems like it's a good enough match to start a conversation, I smile or send an email.

Now I did get a smile, out of the blue from a girl from out of town. We sent a couple of emails, but then she asked me about the whole not wanting kids thing. I was honest. Then she blocked me.

Do You Think He's Prettier Than Me?

So now I'm thinking I might not just be a congenial, kinda goofy-looking geek. I'm a monster, a hideous, illiterate, slavening, primal-urge-driven monstrosity. An Oh Henry! bar floating in the filter of the gene pool. So I did what any guy would do. I did a search on the guys. What's the competition like out there?

Dear god in Heaven.

The search comes up, it's like a buffet from a friggin' Firemen Beefcake Calendar! Muscled up, tan guys who can actually string a sentence or two together. No wonder nobody sends me an email back. The only smiles I get insist that the men show them a picture, but they don't bother to supply one (bug, big, bells go off at that). I'm friggin' doomed to an eternity of celibacy.

I'll have to see what those rates are, and if she takes credit cards...

It's Christmas! Shut up!

Okay. Yes. I know I said I'd start up the Rocket Surgeon site. I know I said I'd do stuff, but it's Christmas, the annual sinkhole of the Time/Money continuinuinuoum.
Okay that and I have discovered more wonderful wastes of time.
Board Game: http://www.fantasyflightgames.com/ti3about.html Twilight Imperium. $100 and 3 hours just get the damn pieces outta the sprues. Joy! Rapture! Xacto-blade cuts! Conquering spaaaaaaace!
Okay dammit I like Space sci-fi. Lord of the Rings is wonderful and all but I need big frikken lasers to keep the geek mojo spinnin'. And George Lucas has not helped in this regard with Episodes I-III (Star Wars: I Ran Out of Ideas) , which is ironic 'cuz he started me on this path.

And it won't get better. Aside from going to Mom's place for Carbo-Load 2005, tomorrow (the 20th) is geek day: Serenity DVD and Battlestar Galactica season 2 DVD in stores. I'll be damn lucky to make it into work once I get my mitts on those sci-fi treats.

My Blog Is Down

So I'm attempting to republish

Uh yeah

Hey all (okay, you two).
Again, I have been lax on updates here. But Project:Rocket Surgeon is underway, I just need to put some notes together. So far, I've done a preliminary object model based on the rules and abstracting the parent-objects out. Very rough at the moment, and will chnage quickly. I just need to organize my thought.

On other fronts, well still single (no shocker) but coming to grips with it. Not like I'm moping about or anything, but trying to perform damage control on friends whom I've lost contact with over the past three years. Kinda tough but doable.

So lessons learned:

1. Don't abandon friendships because a s/o demands so much of your time
2. Physical attraction is a must, follow the rules (which I have yet to publish)
3. Common interests are a must. While people may have interests in common, it's more important that they have sensibilities in common.
4. Don't date Daddy's Little Girl
5. She has to make me laugh as well

Rules. Right.

Okay I came up with about 10 a while ago, based on previous relationships. Now I'm keeping some, tossing others, so in no particular order:

• Face makes or breaks
• Smile makes the face
• Smarter makes me harder
• Must have a career, not kinda maybe planning one someday, if she has to
• Cannot be taking long-term medication for a mental disorder
• Must like at least one of: sci-fi/fantasy, comics, games or misc geeky pursuits
• Must have geek-like tendencies
• No Daddy's Little Girls

And Homer's First Rule: No Fat Chicks! Fat means morbidly obese, I like curvy wimmins!

Hopefully Project Rocket Surgeon will go online tomorrow.

Oh yeah one more thing http://www.answerology.com rocks my socks off. Having fun being a know-it-all, getting some good advice and fun place to be!

Stage Three

Okay, two weeks post-breakup.

A buddy of mine says I have to go through Stage 3, which is apparently a Friends reference. Stage 3 is going to a strip club.
Now I think I've been to the peelers once in the past three years. And in that interval something strange (at least to a fogey like me) has happened.

The majority of the clientele were female. At the strip club. With nekkid wimmins on stage.

While I certainly think this is a good thing, when the hell did this happen? Most were coupled up with guys, but there was a stagette there as well, and not just dropping in for a drink. And alot (estimates show about 70%) were good looking. Also note that very, very few were over the age of thirty. One or two that were with boyfriends looked distinctly uncomfortable (which I have seen before) but most were right into it: throwing loonies, wooping it up. And the strippers, I mean exotic entertainers were right into it as well, paying more attention to the ladies than the men.

Which makes sense because the ladies were the ones shouting appreciation and chucking money at the posters held between the thighs and buttocks.

So once again, I was born too late!

Girls, sorry I mean women, my age simply don't do that. Or play video games. Or understand the appeal of cartoons. And if they do, they're taken. Or 15 years younger than me.

It was me who said he wanted to be single right? Well I still am glad I am, but feelin' a tad older than I thought I was.

Need to find me a copy of Dirty Old Men For Dummies. Or something.

Singularity

There will be a slight delay on my Rocket Surgeon project. My girlfriend and I broke up on Saturday.

Its not for the reasons of the previous post, then again it is. The kid thing threw her for a loop (when we had met she felt the same way as I, but seems to have changed her mind).

That, and every couple of weeks she would get very upset that we weren't living together yet, even though we both agreed to wait until she was done school in May.

Other reasons as well, but boil down to we really weren't into each other anymore. Another just friends scenario, but the first one I agreed with.

So it was mutual, but not 50/50. More like 75/25 with me being the 75. 10% of that is her constantly calling me cheap despite the fact I always paid the lion's share when we went out. Not to mention (okay I'll mention in) that I have car payments, student loans, a line of credit to pull down, my own tution for the course I've been taking etc ad nauseum. And I don't have Daddy to run to (uh-oh, getting a visit from the Bitter Fairy).

Post preakup blues in 5...4...3...2...

But I will start on Rocket Surgeon this week, as I have taken the next three days off of work. That and house cleaning.

Rock On ye Christian Soldiers, drinking as to War!

Rocket Surgeon in Training

Okay, as per my last post, I would like to take on the heady mantel of indie game developer.

The one teeny, tiny hitch is that I never coded a game.

Sure, I've designed games in my head, even gone as far as mapping out the mechanics on paper, but I even haven't done my own clone of Tetris. So I'm gonna put my money (which in this case, equals time) where my keyboard is.

As my 3Ds class has ended, I now have free Saturdays. I'm going to dedicate those Saturdays to building a game. Here's the rules:

• The game will be a single-client, 2-player version of Rocketmen (see sidebar for link)
• The game will be written in C# (which I have yet to really learn, and work sure as hell ain't paying for training).
• The game will only use basic top-down graphics as graphics are not the focus of this. The caveat to that is to make graphics as non-coupled with the game engine as possible.
• The game will be complete by March, 2006.

However I will not be distributing code, as WizKids Games does hold the copyright. This is an educational exercise only.

I will be blogging the experience though (separate blog) as I go long, almost live, so I'll have an intense developer journal. I'll post a link when I post the first blog.

Now, to find a copy of Visual Studio for C# I can use.. oh wait, the Borg are happy to supply one!

Here I go!

Eeep!

The PC Gap

So a couple of days ago I went into my local EB games to pick up a used copy of ICO and maybe Shadow of the Titans. Now while its rare I go specifically for acquiring console games, I did check out the PC game rack. The first and perhaps most significant thing I noticed was the amount of shelf space devoted to PC games shrunk. Alot. Like, by a half.

I think that's a pretty succinct statement on the state of PC gaming right there.

We have new consoles gearing up over the next year, so alot of the developers have been frantically developer console games. Sure, some of them fully intend to deploy ports to PC, but it wasn't so long ago that it was the other way around.

PC gamers are getting the hand-me-downs now. Which completely changes the dynamics of game play.

Now a port from a PC to console meant that the console got fewer features, primarily because of hardware limitation. You don't have a full keyboard to play with, just a controller with a limited number of functions. Graphics are hardwired, so your resolutions would below PC standard (although in some it's hard to tell if they did it right). Space was limited to one cartridge or CD.

So PC ports were essentially stripped down, bare bones version of the games.

Now it's going the other way, we have PC games that looks and play like console games, with everything that entails.

Now don't get me wrong, there are alot of platform to PC games I love, two that come to mind are Psychonauts and Beyond Good and Evil. Great games. Fantastic games. Er, I had a point here.

Oh yeah! Okay, as a PC gamer I'm looking for something with a little more depth than your average platformer game. I have a keyboard and kick-ass graphics card. I have gigs of hardrive space. C'mon developers of the world, use 'em up! Whatever happened to combat flight simulators that simulated flight?

Okay back to my original point, shrinking PC game space. First, everyone jumped on the MMO band wagon. So every shop was forced to make an MMO by their parent companies smelling huge profits (and no clue on cost) So right there, no single player RPG for you! And like I said, those who aren't building the next big thing in the MMO space are building the next big gun for the next gen console wars.

And PC gamers? Well we have MMOs. And no new games, really. Thus the shrinking shelf-space for PC games.

But I think this will (eventually, certainly not right now) be a good thing.

I've often commented (ie complained) about Big Business taking over the game space, with all the mediocrity that entails.

So what if all the big boys focus solely on the consoles? We have a gap. A gap to be filled by the indie developers. So (hopefully) we get games built for PC gamers, by PC gamers, that use the potential of the PC.

It'll be 1984, all over again.

And maybe this time I can get in on it. Here's hoping anyway.

Fluids! Dear God, the Fluids!

Okay, mee-sa sick. I mean, Exorcist ill. There's stuff being produced and projected from my body that belies description or even comprehension.
The human organism is a truly disgusting thing, especially when it's not functioning at 100%. I mean, dear God, I am getting a very poignient lessen on hydro-dynamics and sluices.
This shouldn't be happening on a Friday. That's what Mondays are for. Not promising to be a good weekend.

Jacko Gettin' A Smacko

Heheh, looks like everyone's fovorite Game Critic is being investigated by his local BAR Association.

http://arstechnica.com/news.ars/post/20051019-5458.html

Ale & Whores for Gabe and Tycho!

That's a Big Margin, Jack

So for those who don't know, here's a little background.
http://www.penny-arcade.com

Personally, Jack Thompson fascinates me. Not the man himself, but the methods he uses and the greater context of how this has been used in the past. From what I can see, he's aggressively persecuting a marginalized social group to bring attention and aggrandize himself and his goals.

It's been done, many, many times before. There's some nasty examples, but in the 20th century it was comic books, television, Rock and/or Roll music (and every variation since the birth of R&R). Now it's video games.

You see, if you go at a group that has no power, there is no capability of retaliation on their part. It's very effective, of course. The 'crusaders' appear (or try to appear) as paragons of virtue, protecting the innocent (won't somebody please think of the children!) and rooting out those who would destroy society. In a way they are right. Many of the marginalized concepts, ideas, media etc that are persecuted in this way do threaten society: they attempt to change the status quo.

Technology has always done this (going back to medieval times, crop rotation anyone?) and there has always been those who are violently opposed (Jacquard's Loom. http://www.columbia.edu/acis/history/jacquard.html) What I don't see in alot of references is that Jacquard's earliest looms were burned and Jacquard forced to flee a mob. At least that's how my profs told the story.

So here we are at the beginning of a new millennium and computers pervade every aspect of our lives. (Heck you are reading my diary from a remote location and can access this instantly. That's Big JuJu). The rapid pace of this leaves most people with a nagging, quiet discomfort in technology. Which opens up the door to doubt, which leads to fear. The thin edge of the wedge. And we nothing to fear but fear itself.

So here comes Jack.

Video games are cop-killer trainers and child-rape simulators. They mentally hurt our kids, they teach people to become mass murders. Technology, if uncontrolled by those who know better than you, will run amuck and destroy the very fabric of society. That's the middle of the wedge. The back end of the wedge is limiting use of technology. It starts with games, then moves on to other bits. like you can't record Desperate Housewives and watch it later because you gotta take the kids to soccer practice. You need to pay a fee every time you listen to a song because that's the only way to ensure you aren't stealing it. The authorities need a way to break into your computer without you knowing because you may be a terrorist. And what scares me, what terrifies the life out of me, is I hear alot of people say you should just ignore him and he'll go away.

He's not going to go away.

If we ignore him, it gives him free reign to say whatever he wants. And if those views aren't opposed with logical counter-arguments, opinion or even down-right anger, those who don't know what's going on will think he's telling the only version of the truth. And at that moment we lose. Not just gamers.

Everyone.

The first wedge is locked in place, and there's more behind it. And behind each wedge there someone with a hammer... Now the entire presumption is that gamers are a marginalized sub culture. I honestly think Jack believes that gamers are a bunch of nerdy dorks who have nothing better to do than play games in their parents' basement. That may have been somewhat true at one time. Now, not so much. You just need to watch the news and how gaming is the next big money market for media companies. there's alot of gamers out there, in all levels of society and of all ages. If gamers are marginalized, it's a wide margin.

Penny-Arcade, whether you like it or not, is a locus of gaming culture. They have alot of clout in that marginal community, and at their word, they can focus that drive very, very tightly. Their charity events raise a boggling amount of money and goods for kids, and it all comes from that 'margin'. The wedge may have, with a clumsy carpenter holding the hammer, hit a knot in the wood.

As entertaining as the situation is, I think what comes next will be a turning point in Mr. Thompson's career. His call to have Gabe and Tycho arrested crosses a certain boundary. Not of civility or even law. It's a statement that says that gamers are citizens that should be arrested for voicing an opinion. the exertion of power, any kind of power, is to be handled the fastest and most damning curtailment that society can offer. Civic arrest. If not violence, at least the threat of violence (which is basis of any police force) is what an arrest is. Mr. Thompson didn't threaten to sue, he requested that Gabe and Tycho be arrested. Even if the Seattle police don't follow up on this, even if Gabe and Tycho don't react and choose to ignore him, it sets a precedent that's dangerous indeed. More requests for arrests will come, and eventually an arrest will be made, for no other reason that someone who enjoys and supports a gaming culture can be arrested merely for supporting that culture.

And that is tyranny. Being persecuted not for what you do, but for who you are. By those who hold power. I'm watching this one with both eyes.

Been a long while, but that's just me.

Okay so I haven't been on in a while. The game reviews are still under way, but frankly I haven't had the time and/or inclination to do much gaming lately. It is time for an update though, meaning I'm in one of my 'pensive' moods.

Game Space
Not much happening here I'm afraid. I am beta testing another couple of games (can't say which, NDA and all that). I can say one needs alot of work at a concept level and the other is rocking. Not surprisingly, the former has been delayed and the latter is due out soon.
I did pick up a couple cheapo Playstation 2 games. Mark of Kri is a great 3rd person action game except it's nearly impossible to do combos, and you need to do combos. Just more practice I guess.
Final Fantasy X-2 proves why I don't like Japanese RPGs all that much. Confusing but gorgeous, so the animator in me still pays attention. However the actually game play is annoying (a random encounter every 5 feet? c'mon!) and gets me wishing for a fast forward button for the next part of the story...
The third one is Rumble Roses. I am a sick, sick little boy. A mediocre wrestling games with great ... polygons.
And there isn't much coming out that I'm terribly interested in. Since the Big Corps are now taking over the market, well I'm bored with the pablum. There are some people trying to get more organized for the small and mid-sized developer (check out http://www.costik.com/weblog for someone I hope gets huge success. I love reading The Escapist (www.escapistmagazine.com/) as they have some more professional journalistic writing than say, IGN or Gamespy.

Book Space
And for books well, I'm taking a 3d Studio Max course at the local educational instipitution, and lovin' it! I can spend (and have on numerous occassions) 8 hours just playing and experimenting. The class itself is pretty good, covering the basics to get you on your way. Since I want the deep dark secrets I picked up a couple books.

3ds Max 6 Bible: well I've tried 3 of the tutorials and only 1 actually worked as advertised, so I'm not impressed so far. However it's a thick book so I won't write it off yet.

modeling a Character in 3ds Max by Paul Steed on the other hand is a fantastic book. Essentially one long tutorial on how to model the babe on the cover it goes into minute detail on every step with lots of pics. It's also well written and Mr. Steed certainly has a sense of humour. I haven't started the tutorials yet (and may not be able to) but I've read through some chapters and it's exactly what a new 3d modeler needs.

And of course Thud! by Terry Pratchett! Bringing back the Guards of Ankh-Morpork (my favourite) it's a great read, but with most of his later books, you really, really need to read a few to get the background.

Geek Space
Okay like I said, I have been taking classes in 3ds Max. Since they are Saturdays from 9 AM to 4 PM it basically means I have another day of work, but if my other 5 were like my Saturdays, I'd never leave the office. So that's going well.

So my latest addiction is getting ships from WizKids Rocketmen http://www.wizkidsgames.com/rocketmen/. I haven't actually played yet and I've spent waaaaytoo much cash on the cards. On the upside I'm using them as models for creating my own 3ds max models and animations, so I guess I can justify it....

Yeah I'm totally geeking out on this whole animation thing.

Head Space
We with winter approaching fast, I'm slowly degenerating into my Winter Grump (it's early this year). Work is driving me nuts, but since I said I wouldn't post work rants anymore, I'll leave it for the tell-all book. However I have engaged the services of a head-hunter and am following up on contacts with great urgency so I getting my ass in gear instead of just whining (hear that Stray Lemming?). Of course I will continue to whine loudly and publicly at every opportunity.

The other thing is the girlfriend situation. Lately I've been doing alot of soul searching (my Granddad died about a month ago) and I think I'm coming to the conclusion that I want to be a single guy for the rest of my days.

I've tried the whole relationship thing a couple of times (okay 4 times) but the awful truth is that:
1) I don't want kids. Not just "I'm not in a place right now where I want kids" I mean I neverwant kids. Actually considering getting the boys snipped in that cause. I like kids, as long as they are not mine and wrecking my place. Besides, I'm 37, a tad late in my view.
2) I don't want to get married. I mean I've been to all seven of my parents' weddings (counting the one to each other twice) and frankly the whole marriage thing seems outdated to me.
3) I like living alone. My own space, my own stuff, and my own money. Relationships are expensive and with the current GF back at school I'm paying for everything. Add on top of that, she wants to buy a place together the day she graduates. She'll be neck-deep in debt, looking for work and she's hinted that if she gets a job out of town, I'm expected to follow.

And I know that sounds close-minded.

Lately I've been feeling that everyone wants something from me, but when I ask for something, it's not convenient, or not do-able right now. It's boiled down to 'I'll do what you want as long as you leave me alone after'. And that never actually happens in real life.

Like I said, the winter blues and blowing hard and fast from the north.

So yeah winter is coming, I'll be indoors more so I'll probably update this once in a while (I know, you've heard it all before).

Anyway, last load of laundry is done, have fun!

DM