Right, This Thing

As Capa mentioned, it's time for my "quartery update". It say something sardonic but he's pretty much getting it right, there.

First off, 'gratz to Big M and KAJ, who will be Big M and KAR after today: they are (finally) getting married. Thanks for the bachelor party M, I think I dropped about $150 at the casino. No strippers, but I still got taken for a ride...

Speaking of which, I just dropped $1000+ on my car at the dealership. Seems there were a whole bunch of problems that strangely never cropped up when my car was coverd by my warantee which expired in February. Looks like I'll be using Mr. Lube from now on. There's a joke in there somewhere...

On the work front, well I had a couple potential interviews supposedly set up throug some contracting companies but for some reason they aren't returning my calls. Quite disappointing to say the least. But the job search continues as my current one just seems to be getting more stressful as the days go by. I didn't think it was all that possible. Every day for the past couple of weeks I've been updating the resignation letter. My little bro had some good advice though: if you are going to just up and quit, do it at the beginning of summer. Which has the added advantage of Laroo being off for the summer.

Yup, me and Laroo are still going strong. She's such a cutie, especially when she is stressed. Which is all the time actually but her big production is over as of tonight so we're winging away (okay driving) for a weekend in the mountains. I think she'll sleep through it all, whihc is fine, I have alot of books to read. And yes Capa, DVDs to watch: I started on teh 4400, don't ruch me.

Anyways, I have a monkey suit to don: wedding in a few hours.

Okay, Three Things

First, it was officially the first day of Spring! When I ran screaming from the office today (what most people call "going to lunch") I saw the first mini-skirts of the season! While it dos take some time for the eyes to adjust to the pallor the site affords, it's a sure sign the Spring is around the corner!

Second, the whole writing routine is coming together. I finished a rough draft of "When I Became the Boss" and started on "Dad's Hole". Both are children's books for grown-ups: the first relating the tale of when a computer programmer gets promoted and the second a story of how a girl's father dug a hole so deep the whole house fell in.

I've also started "The Flora and Fauna of the Cubicle Plains". It's my humble contribution to help save the environment. My observations have uncovered various birds, such as the Twittering Agile, and the Yellow-Bellied Kwikwyn. There have also been a number of mammals sighted: the Black Berryfondle, the Caffeinated Sloth and of course the majestic Silver-Back Legacy Beaver. I even encountered a strange species of tortoise: the Directionless Steering Tortoise to be precise. I am currently writing up characteristics and common habitats of these creatures and should have some rough drafts available soon.

And of course the reading on writing is going swimmingly. I finished off Stephen King's "On Writing" and have started a couple of the other books on loan to me. Hopefully I'll have those back to their respective owners by the end of April.

Thirdly, I must admit I find myself in the grips of another obsessive-compulsive little phase. It's been quite a while since the last one so this ain't so bad. The object of my obsession this time is 18th Century Naval warfare. In other words, Pirates!

You see about a month back my little brother and room-mate borrowed a copy of "Sid Myers' Pirates!" and started playing on his laptop. So I decided to load my version on my laptop. I think I even managed to get Laroo interested in playing. We'll see on that though.

Then I recalled that there was a MMO based on the player being a pirate or national captain in the 1700's West Indies. Revisiting the site, I found myself quite enamored with Pirates of the Burning Sea. Quite enamored. As far as searching incessantly online for ship and sail designs, pirate lore and even exclaiming "Ahoy!" to those lubbers at work. Arrrrrrrr....

And that in turn had me pricing out a new do-it-yourself home gaming rig.

Add Spore to that and you have yourself a gaming future.

Meanwhile, I've stumbled upon two really good time wasters. Spamalot! is pretty much your basic catapult game, but add the Monty Python and the Holy Grail theme's and graphics and well, I'm hooked. The other way I've been wasting time is this little gem which is really hand drawn. Amazing what you can do with no artistic ability but an insidious mind....

And that's three things! Now I must go fling chickens at the French. Arrr........

Two Hour Window

As some of you know, I took last week off of work. Going into work today was met with a deep-rooted, gnawing dread that was completely justified as it turns out...

And as all of you, when I take a week off I tend to set some lofty goals for myself which I never seem to be able to accomplish. Notice I didn't do that this time around. The only goal I set for myself was to think a bit about life the universe and everything.

A good portion of the week was spent with Laroo, and that's always good. I managed to meet some of her family and made a good impression, some of her co-workers (and likewise) and actually helped her in her dramatic endeavors. That didn't turn out so well but I blame false advertising on that. Anyone want ten walkie-talkies cheap?

There were a couple of job interviews. Well maybe "interview" is too strong a word. One was a "getting to know you" session with a recruiter (which went well) and one was a recruitment for an RRSP pyramid scheme (which went well considering the pretenses I was offered and there was not a lot of blood shed afterwards).

Add a "boys night out" with the bros as we re-lived our violent childhood by playing board games; accusing each other at cheating, rules lawyering and all around poor sportsmanship, more time with Laroo, another interview for the writing group and various trips to the airport, it sums up to a busy week.

But I did engage the brain. What I engaged it with was some thought on routine.

I am very much a routine kinda guy. But getting into that routine takes some effort as I am also a lazy kinda guy. Two things I need to get into a routine: working out and writing. And they both take a considerable amount a of time given my schedule.

Consider: on a good day I get home at 5:30 PM (today, not so much....). After whatever I call dinner and the cleanup it's about 6:30 or 7. Which leaves me about 2 hours of energy left before I spend the night listening the elephant stomping around upstairs (not as much metaphor there as you think or as I wish).

The gym is two hours fifteen minutes from out the door to back at home.

The goal is to write 1000 words a day. Which takes me about two hours. And also scares the hell out of me.

So I can't do both. Not every day (maybe on weekends, but from now until April 1, all my weeks are belong to Laroo).

So I'm going for either/or. Either I go to the gym and do a full work out or I write or do writing-related stuff for two hours. Yes, I will include this blog (practice) and the writing blog (more practice). I'm also including reading about writing as that's educational and if it's all like Stephen King's "On Writing" it's also a treat.

How many words is that? 511... Okay back to Mr. King! 517...

V-Day

First off, Happy V-day to everyone! And a very special V-Day (although we will be celebrating on the weekend) to my Laroo who said some very nice things about me and who needs a hug. So I drove through a blizzard (okay a lot of ice fog) lousy roads and the Driver Stupidex at "Danger! Danger Will Robinson!" levels to give her lots of them.

I'm such a good boyfriend.

One of the things we have in common is the whole competency thing. And the very low threshold for allowing people to do a lousy job. With the big production she's doing at work, it's getting her down, so all of you go wish her well just because she makes me happy. Happier. Okay, less full of hate. And that's a miracle in itself!

Love ya, Laroo!

So in job hunting news: I've had some time for the Hate-o-meter to settle down and stabilize a bit. It's still pretty high up on that there chart and the urge to quit (I just backspaced over "urge to kill") is still daily.

But I'm not going to just up and quit without having a new job. I've spent seven years getting this cash together and dammit I'm going to enjoy it!

So I've been putting the booster on the job hunt engine. I've applied for a couple jobs at specific places I want to work and a couple generic resumes at contracting companies.

And I got a request to apply for a position in the ol' email-o-tron today. Looks interesting actually: small company looking to grow. Been there done that, will ing to take the salary they are quoting to do it again (woohoo!).

Now go get sick on chocolate, you crazy kids

Not Quite As, But Still, Angry

Alright so the $500+ dollars was the gub'mint's share of my stock option cash in. Sheesh. It means I'll stop paying into CPP (but will never see a thin dime, I'm quite sure) and EI (likewise). Thanks again to Capa for setting me straight. I didn't get a chance to look into things today.

As for work, well, I was training a room full of individuals who will be removing the six-ton albatross from around my neck, so that was okay. But after that was over it was the usual round of me going to various people and asking "Did you actually think about this? Really? Are you sure you thought about this?"

But the plan still holds: new job by the 28th or I'm out by March 15th. A gotta novel or two to write.

And of course on the home front, things get better and better. The L-word was exchanged between myself and Laroo (and I initiated it! yay me!). Yes, that L-word. No not the one on TV. No the other one. L-O-V... never mind.

This is so cool. It's kinda funny too as she is a bit bewildered by the whole thing (and I am too, just not as much). It's kinda cute.

So anyways, just that quick update. Now, I have to surf the various job sites and maybe even (gasp) get some concepts down for writing (had a great idea for a setting for a sci-fi series: TV, movie, game comics or novels? Who knows? When you get lucky, you get all five.)

L-O-V-E. There. I blogged it. Now the whole world knows! Virtually I mean. You know.

So Much for That

What a day. The feeling of not-rage has cumulated into the state of being known as "Full of Hate".

Actually Capa contributed to that in a way by forwarding an email that would have set me off on a murderous rampage. Okay, at least assault and battery with a blunt instrument (a 5' 2" lead administrator) against a pair of application managers (who seemed to epitomize at least two of the deadly sins each, so they would have had it coming). If he hadn't I would be posting this from holding cell. You know what I mean.

What today did was high-light the fact that whenever I need someone to get something done, I have to fight for even the simplest request tooth and nail. Meanwhile when someone asks me to do something, I generally do it (although I have to strain some of them through the Idiocracy filter).

So a decision has been made. The entire office (or at least my department) are moving to a new location in March. Personally, that means that my half-hour walk to work now becomes a sixty minutes drive to work. Where there isn't enough parking. And a cubicle that is about four feet wide. And that's one of the big ones.

It's just not worth it.

If it so happens (and it's a good possibility) that I don't have a new job by then I will give two weeks notice. After that my time would be dedicated to a job search and my writing. I have enough cash to get me through three months without dipping into credit. Not my favorite as it's taken me quite a while to get that sum together, but it's money or health. And you can't put a good price on health.

And on top of that today, the roads are a mess. So the chances of seeing the wonderful Laroo for a hug and snuggle session is fading quickly.

Update: And on top of all that I just noticed my last paycheck is about $500 short. This may move up the schedule.

Sunny Walks

For the first time in months, the walk home was actually not done in complete darkness. Granted the sun had slunk behind the horizon (probably to get out of the wind and cold). You have no idea how much of big deal that is. Or maybe you do: most of my readership lives within ten miles of me.

An odd thing happened to me yesterday: I was at work and it actually didn't suck. This may have had something to do with Capa loaning me his DS with Elite Beat agents for a while, but I doubt it (although getting a DS has moved up in the "gotta have" list).

No, what happened was I had a productive day. At least in relation to all the other days since September where I felt like I was fighting a zombie army of clueless wonders. Today was a bit more "normal" although that probably had something to do with software we developed four or five years ago not working with Vista. So now the zombie horde is wondering how we can rewrite 120 applications in two weeks.

I'm still applying for jobs elsewhere: this is probably just my winter blues beginning to fade.

Laroo rocks. For those just tuning in, she is my significant other. Her schedule over the next two months is going to be insane (check out her blog for reasons why) and we probably won't see each other as much as we want but all that means is that when we do get together, it's very special. Not short-bus special. Limo special.

Still, I'm tempted to drag her from her place of work, pick up her dog on the way to the airport and wing our way to a tropical location where bathing suits aren't required (Laroo doesn't own one. I see that as an opportunity).

Get this: we bought a Lego dragon and built it together. She actually hung it up in her house. How cool is that?

Week Off! Then Why am I So Stressed?

Yep, all true: I have this week off. As we speak I am typing wearing only underwear and headphones. Actually, I tell a lie, I'm only wearing one of those two items :)

Anyways this is supposed to be a productive week. Supposedly. All the little things I've neglected over the past two months due to surgery, moves, Christmas, laziness and just plain not-having-time I'm trying to resolve this week. So here's a list of things I'm (supposed) to be doing:

Finish filling out all of those pesky change-of-address forms

Get back to the gym routine by going every day this week

Update Monster.ca with the new resume and apply for at least three jobs

Re-organize my stuff as I know I can (barely) fit everything in

Read up on the whole writing thing by actually reading the books Capa and others have loaned me

Update my various blogs, video blogs and writing columns (and thus this post)

Dentist, Eye Doctor and various other health-related appointments

Get my new laptop (yes I got a new laptop) ready for both work (programming software) and writing (finding a free copy of Word if I can)

Laundry and a haircut. But not at the same time

And other things as they come up

What a boring vacation, eh? Ah well, it's been petty good so far (if busy) and I'm actually done many of the above. The gym thing hurts though.

Of course, there's Laura (aka Laroo) who has some very nice things to say about me. I'm blushing, babe!

It's been six weeks (not quite nine and half) and frankly I'm still smitten. Even after taking care of her during a week of a very, very nasty cold.

I could list all the little things like her laugh, her smile, her smarts, her love of all things Shakespeare but the big thing, the huge thing that has me hooked is pretty basic. She knows, I'm a geek, she accepts I'm a geek and she enjoys that I'm a geek. She may not understand the specifics of my geekhood, but she really gets that I enjoy them. No judgment, no rancour just acceptance. Me for me and all that. That, as those who know me, is a huge deal.

And speaking of smitten, everyone say "gratz" to KAJ and Big M who are tying the knot in March. About bloody time you two. I like these guys, I think they are registered at Best Buy. My kinda peoples. I promise to make a huge jack-ass of myself at the reception.

Crime and Punishment

Interesting times continues....

I get into the elevator this morning and find a notice on the inside: there was a break-in in the downstairs, underground, "secure" parking lot and everybody should check their vehicles. So naturally I check.

Smashed passenger side window, nothing taken out of my car. As I toured around the lot to see how many got busted windows, I noticed the interior door leading to stairwell is off its hinges. And I realize the lock and the hinges are on the same side of the door. Brilliant.

So at lunch I go down to the downtown police station, where they tell me I need to bring the vehicle in to be inspected, and that I should do that at another location. I beg off work early, go half way across town to another station, and they tell me since it's a break and enter, I need to call the police (because calling the police from a police station is just crazy talk). So I get home and call the police at about three in the afternoon. They finally arrived around 8, took my statement, looked very seriously at my car. They're still outside.

So it looks like I'm out about $400 because some rummy (or similar) needed another bottle (or similar).

Not a good way to start the week.

I'll save the update on Laroo (my significant other) later, when I'm feeling more mushy and not filled with the urge to don a mask and take justice into my own hands.

Moby's Year in Review

Again, sorry for the long period between posts. The move, Christmas, new girlfriend and general winter wonderland crap means I have a lot to blog about but no time to write. So I'm writing this at work.

As the year end approaches, it's time to sit back, relax, fall asleep and snort yourself awake. After that it's time to look back over the past year and see what was good, what was bad, and what was, well life.

Having read over the last year's blogs, I have come to one conclusion: I am bored a lot. Maybe it's adult onset ADD, maybe it's being thirty something and single but it seems to happen quite a bit. For those of you who continue reading this blog, my profound thanks: your life must be nearly as dull as mine.

However there have been some highlights. The entire first half of 2006 seemed a waste. It wasn't until July that things got interesting. The trip to Toronto, while not garnering me a new job, allowed me to acquaint myself with the cool side of my family. And experience lap-dances. And cottages. All good one and all (did I mention lap-dances?).

Fall saw a return to the groove (or more appropriately the rut). Work frustrations multiplied, friends stood divided, things were added and subtracted and because I want to over-extend this theme, I tried to get to the square root of all things.

December though: if I whinged about being bored for eleven months, December more than made up for it. The move in with my little brother was finally executed (and considering what's been happening over the past weeks, my brother may be executed as well), Christmas meant the yearly frenzy of shopping, hatred of all things festive and spending too much time traveling. And I met Laura. And fell hard for Laura.

The end of the year brought this very unexpected surprise into my life. I have never yet met a woman I felt so completely at ease with. How many women out there are smart, funny, fun, sexy, educated and think I am too! Seriously, three, maybe six? At most?

So yeah, falling hard and fast. Moby is smitten. She knitted me mittens. That's unprecedented. There's a lot of things that have been happening between us that have no precedent for either of us. We're both pretty relationship challenged, so it's like we're sixteen (and I am not looking forward to my next cell-phone bill).

Could be happier only if I won the lottery.

So As I move into 2007 with a new place (and if nothing else my brother will inspire some writing, a murder mystery perhaps?), a great new girlfriend (which sounds odd as she is older than me) a possible new job and a new laptop (coming soon) 2007 will prove to be less boring than 2006. I am a firm believer that "interesting times" is a curse, this year it may not be.

Happy New Year. Maybe for real.

Moving

The move to my brother's place is on Saturday. I've taken Thursday and Friday off to pack. I have alot of crap.

Discounting the huge volume of Lego, I still have alot of crap. Going through just my CDs, DVDs and software took up about 6 hours to get sorted and packed up.

Just finished cleaning out the storage room. Oh, the humanity!

Next up: finish laundry, drop off dry-cleaning and clothing donations, buy more garbage bags, disconnect the modem and cable box, clean up for a date tonight (big smile on my face, and that's the only one I cracked today) drop off and set up cable box and modem at the new place then go on a date.

Tomorrow: pack up clothing and kitchen, finish off living room, collapse in heap. Then the actual move Saturday. Oh and somewhere in there I have to finish my Christmas shopping.

I seem to recall last time I moved I swore to hire movers.

'Tis The Season

To go postal, falalalala-lalalala.....

Oi. Christmas shopping. The time of year where any modicum of intelligence flees from people of all races, creeds and colours. You know what I mean, the drivers are focused on getting to the mall, the shoppers are blind to traffic because they need to find that perfect present, and the malls. My gods, the malls.

This year I tried to organize a rota with my brothers: we would each get a sub-set of the super-sized family, but presents only for those folks and then put all our names on the card. Simple, effective and time saving.

Didn't work: one doesn't want to get gifts for some parts of the extended family, another hates Christmas shopping so much he refuses to leave the house. Meanwhile, it was me who had to go emergency shopping, go to everyone in Calgary who am I related to and pick up their presents and deliver them to the middle of bald ass prairie to give to my mother. She of course traded off her gifts which I intend to distribute to the family in Calgary by the "Come and pick it up your own damn self!" methodology.

Bah. Humbug.

Add to that I'm trying to actually get packed to move on Saturday. The end result would be the aforementioned "postal" thing.

Except...

Her name is Laura and it is kind of scary how well we get along how compatible we seem to be and how much we are into each other so very, very quickly. We've only been on two dates, but there's chemistry, sparks, philosophy and little family health thrown in to boot.

I won't go into the sappy stuff, but it's good sappy stuff. She loves Shakespeare. Those that know me know what kind of effect that has to have. I even went so far as to send her links to the writing site (and there's a new interview here as well). And to here. But I had second thoughts on this one: there's alot of things here that don't paint me in the best light, so I asked her to hold off. And, amazingly, I do trust her to hold off: she's an honest gal, right up front.

So, right now I have to update the resume, finish the bloody Christmas shopping, pack away some stuff so I can talk to Laura again.

Yup, Moby is genuinely smitten. Damn if it isn't a Christmas miracle.

Momentary Pause

Hey All!

As predicted, last weekend's bored state was soon followed by a hellacious week at work. But today may be somewhat of a banner day.

I had an off site meeting that may provide great opportunities for the future (no not Amway).

I had another off site meeting, which was an actual date that may also provide great opportunities for the future (no not a Russian Bride).

Tomorrow I have to start packing, do emergency Christmas shopping and go into work to fix yet another emergency caused by someone else's stupidity. So the "May you live in interesting times" curse continues on.

But tonight, well tonight went ... well.

Wow, I'm Bored

That actually hasn't in quite a while. Well, I was bored out of my skull the first five days after surgery, but that was induced because I was blind. Now I'm actually bored.

This is never good.

It always seems that after a boring day, the following weeks are a constant barrage where I wish I was bored.

That is all. See? Boring.

Popeye

So a week after the surgery, I have 20/20 vision in one eye and an inflammation in the other. So it was 50% successful. I know I shouldn't be worried but Murphy tends to make me his bitch. In the meantime I can't drive, which would suck if it wasn't -40 outside.

The surgery itself took only about twenty minutes here's what happened:

They sit you down in a dentist chair and make you look at this light on a machine above you. Then they dump about a gallon of anesthetic onto the eyeball which makes it both insensitive and unable to move (which is important).

Then they clamp your eyelid open, a la A Clockwork Orange. The patient then makes a joke about the movie and the medical staff groans and informs the patient that everyone says that.

This makes it very freaky when the doctor takes what is actually a very tiny spatula but looks friggin huge and you can see it scrape the layer of goo off your eyeball. You can also feel pressure on the eye which makes you little sick to your stomach.

After that they wash off the eyeball with water or something. Now it's time for zapping. And I do mean zapping. The laser makes a helluva noise: I actually jumped quite a bit when it first went off. It's not a constant laser, rather it pulses away a micro-millimeter of eyeball at a time.

Which brings us to the gross part. When the laser is zapping, you can smell roasted eyeball. What's worse is that you can feel sizzling little bits of eyeball landing on your forehead and cheeks.

I'll leave you with that image. Time for a fried egg sandwich.

Three Hours to Go

This may be my last message if things don't go well. Laser eye surgery in three hours.

I wasn't nervous yesterday, but I am a bit now. After all, you keep hearing that you aren't supposed to point laser pointers and similar devices into peoples eyes and here I go paying a large amount of money to have someone do that for me.

The real worry is the post-op stuff. It sounds like I need to get at least four different kinds of eye drops, one of which I need to use every fifteen minutes for the first week. Which will suck.

I am glad I am getting this done though. Barring the week of "discomfort" (which can be anything from dry, itchy sensations to searing, blinding pain) I think it's well worth it.

I've been wearing glasses since I was twelve, which means after twenty-six years, I'll be free. After getting my first pair, my father said, and I quote "If you break those I'll kill you". And ever since then spectacles have been an annoying part of my life.

Socially, well, nowadays there's a certain acceptance of specs, but in the seventies and eighties, if you wore glasses you were a geek/nerd/spaz/loser. Okay I am a geek but now I wonder if wearing glasses was a major contributor to that. When you have specs, physical activity of any kind is petty restricted so the only real alternative is pursuing more cerebral activities.

And glasses just ain't sexy.

About ten years ago I started wearing contacts, which I fully admit is a vanity thing. You can actually do something more physical with them on (skiing etc) but the level of maintenance required is considerable. And of course once in a while they decide to jump out of your head, which causes all kinds of trouble.

So after all is said and done (and dropped) the cost of the procedure is what I spend in about five years, and the folks at the clinic said at my current rate I won't need glasses again for about twenty years. Add to that miracle of waking up every morning and not having to fumble around for specs or go through the ritual of trying to get the damn things in. Add to that, I can do stuff, travel and generally walk around without having to worry about breakage, loss or the pure social outcast aspect and it's well worth it.

I know, I'm trying to convince myself here. But those who have been saddled with required eye-ware know what I am talking about. Those with 20/20 vision have no idea, no idea how much having to wear these things affects you.

So I'll see you tomorrow. Maybe.

The Blogger Has No Clothes

That would be because I am on vacation. Well, not "vacation" so much as days off. Surgery is on Wednesday but Monday and Tuesday is supposed to be time to sit back, relax and stew in my own juices.

Not turning out that way though.

So as some of you know, my little brother is in a bit of a pickle. After moving to Calgary from Toronto in August, he broke up with said girlfriend recently, and now has a lease on a very nice apartment which he can no longer afford. So I'm moving in to help him out. I won't be saving any money (actually I will be paying more money for rent and parking) but it's an improvement: en suite dishwasher and laundry, underground parking, hardwood floors etc.

But it means I have to leave the fortress of solitude. Which is okay because it's been getting boring. I like the neighborhood (most times) as it's one of those ones with big trees, quiet (most times) and fairly close to alot of things. But it isn't actually close (within walking distance) to anything really.

The new place is close to the famous/notorious "Red Mile" which means it will be noisy. So I can either stand on the balcony yelling at the world to shut the hell up or go out and do my share to contribute noise pollution. I think I choose the latter.

And for a dirty old man like myself, the girl-watching is much better.

In other news, last week I got notification via email that a package was on it's way. Now this isn't unusually, but I didn't remember ordering that I hadn't already received. So I was intrigued. And worried that I broke my drink-and-surf policy (don't do it) again.

Got it on Saturday. It was video tape and some information on making smart stock purchase decisions in the market of the twenty-first century. With convenient recommendations.

Not that exciting.

So with surgery, the move and of course International Spend Like Crazy days (ie Christmas) coming up, I'm going to be busy and broke. Add to that I'm actually getting some response on Lavalife this time around, 2006 is going to end like most of my projects at work: not enough time, resources or requirements but incredible pressure to get it done by a specific date.

That's Life outside the Fortress of Solitude.

I'm up, I'm up...

Look at the time stamp. I hate it when this happens.

I'm not a morning person by any stretch of the imagination but about once a week I wind up waking up at 5 AM. Now some would say this is a perfect opportunity to do something constructive, and I would agree. Except I'm a bloody wreck when this happens. For example, it took me five minute to write the last sentence.

So I put on a pot of coffee, idly surf, smoke too much, maybe watch an episode of something on DVD, that sort of thing. It really is me time because frankly I wouldn't want to subject anyone to the great grumpiness that is Moby at 5:30 AM.

And of course I always feel the guilt. I should be doing something constructive. Like getting my word count up for NaNoWriMo. Or going to the gym. Or doing the dishes. Or go into work. Okay, maybe not that.

This early morning wakefulness comes at a price. By the time three in the afternoon rolls around I'm a fricken' zombie, including the impulse to bite someone's head off. And the evening is shot.

So I'm writing a post. And drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes. Which I'm almost out of.

There ya go, I'll go buy smokes. I'll get something accomplished at least.

Edit: Almost forgot, I started up my profile on Lavalife again. Not this morning, but on the weekend.

Of course it's just another way for me to avoid word count blues, but what the heck. The only problem is that when you factor in:

Age, mine

Age, hers

The fact I don't want to have kids

The fact that I'm reluctant to date someone with kids

It turns out that the number of matches I get is less than a dozen. So it won't be that much of a distraction.

Russian brides anyone?

Hey I Update!

But now it seems only weekly. Ah well, my excuse is that nothing of interest (even to me) has been happening as of late. If that sounds a tad on the dull side you're right.

So for the update let's start off with work. I know I said I wouldn't kvetch about work here but I gotta make exceptions once in a while. So the new team is very quickly turning into me and nine managers. Yes that's right. Me and nine managers. I have two students working for me but at the rate we're going I'm worried that neither of them will accept an offer (in fact I think one of them needs to go back to school). Granted we have someone new starting next week, but that means I will have less time as I have to train them up. It'll be six weeks before they can be left to their own devices.

Argh.

Friday night was rather intriguing. Me, the two students and most of the nine managers went to shoot pool after work. At the table beside us was half of the (almost all female) Human Resources department. They were out celebrating the occasion of one of their comrade's divorce papers being final. So by six o'clock they were totally wasted. I, of course, joined them in the festivities. The geeks faded by seven, of course. Now the divorce is very, very cute. Her friends are very, very attractive as well. Especially the one who was introduced as being a former pole-dance instructor. And I could believe it. Wishful thinking or no.

The decision was (finally) made to head out. To what is supposedly a cowboy bar. Now, whenever I go to a cowboy bar there is an inevitable scuffle. Alcohol goes in my mouth, and fuels that little sardonic monster in me. He can get vocal.

Fortunately this time there were no faux cowpokes in the vicinity, so I spent a good part of the evening drinking, dancing with the ladies and throwing ice-cubes into their cleavage. Which they insisted I do so they could suck them out of each other's bras. How come when I was twenty-five this was considered unacceptable behavior? Ah well, better late than never.

As the night wound down (about 8 hours after we started) I found myself relegated to guardian of the purses. So soon after I made my departure (ensuring everyone had their purse of course).

The hangover was horrendous.

But overall it was a good night despite the fact that I felt really, really old. But at least I felt like a dirty old man.

That's an improvement.

I gotta look up someone for some pole-dancing lessons next week.

The Power of Words

In this modern day and age, words can hold more power than ever. The power to educate! The power to illuminate! The power to hilarity-ate!!!

But when the power goes it, you can't write suckers down.

Yep, national Novel Writing Month is off to an auspicious start. After actually not going to the comic store for my regular Wednesday fix to set aside time to write, the power goes out in my building.

Now I hear you say "But Moby, you could do it the old fashioned way!".

Not in the dark.

Of course the kicker is that the power went out last night making me late for work. Well, granted I wasn't terribly upset considering the past couple weeks but I had a 9 AM meeting with my boss.


In other news, the Russian Experiment is finito (that's Russian right?) After a deluge of emails I shut 'er down. I've concluded that I'm not internationally undateable but something in the tradition of emergent behavior came about.

Am I looking for a wife as opposed to girlfriend (although that doesn't do the meme justice. Firstly, I realize that I don't see a wife as desirable. Not that I don't want to get married, hell's donkeys, if I find the right woman I'll get down on the knee, say the cheesy question, wear the monkey suit etc. But that's not the goal.

As I've said before, best friend with benefits (and who feels the same about me) is what I seek. Everything else is just icing on the cake.

Regardless, Odessa is still a nice place to vacation, and with my stock option now actually worth money....

For more on the Russian Experiment and various other musings, check out my video blog. I know it's MySpace, but it's free space as well.