Back to Normal

Okay it's obvious with my last few entries that my normal kvetching, never-ending gripe was put on hold for a little while. So, back at it.

Or rather, today was just one of those days. I was actually given a task of some merit and frankly I kept fucking it up, looking like a total twat in front of my new colleagues. I could probably say a bunch of stuff that would sound like excuses and evasions (and in one case that would be accurate). Let's just say that it's not fun walking into a giant system operation where everyone on your team has been working on it for 3+ years. One made a comment that "we are here to work" after I put on my coat to go have a smoke. Which I grant you I've been doing too much of lately out of boredom.

All in all the job is still good, I think (hope) I just had a bad day. An alarm bell went off though. The code I had to fix was a mess and the technical aspects of the promotion procedures left something to be desired, like fucking documentation or a reasonable sense of consistency. I quickly came under the impression that the entire system is a very large and functional prototype. I've had very bad experiences with systems like this: they tend to be outgrown by demand extremely quickly and become a nightmare to maintain, forget about expand.

I really hate the three month probation period. It makes me anxious and paranoid. More than normal I mean.

That and I'm sick again which is getting on my tits. I've had two weeks in the past eight where I was reasonably healthy. The other six have been filled with tissues and Tylenol; snot and sniffing.

I'm a little grumpy today obviously.